So apparently I'm in college or something now. I just finished my lab assignment in Fundamentals of Computers and decided to kill some time before I go meet my friend at 12:45. Might as well let you guys know what's up.
Today's first class at 8:30 was cancelled meaning I only had to come in at 10:00. So that's already putting me in a good mood. Then, we get assigned two really easy assignments involving copy/pasting definitions out of Windows' help file and writing a paragraph about 'why I chose Computer Science at Dawson'. So that's more good stuff. Then as soon as we finish that we're allowed to leave, meaning I could leave at anytime after 10:50. The lab actually finishes at noon so I only had to sit through half of the class. This happens in a lot of other courses where the teacher basically says "Umm, we're done. See you Thursday." and everybody looks around at each other for a few seconds before running towards the door. This is great.
On August 13th I was at Warped Tour on Ile St. Helene (I refuse to call it Ile Jean-Drapeau because I like the old name better). I'm not gonna go into the details about it now but I will tell you that it was beyond amazing. I think I have to make up a new word to describe it. Amazome. Like, amazing and awesome. The only pictures I took were of my feet when I got to my brother's house later on, but they haven't been developed yet. When I get them and scan them I'll try to write up a full report but until then just picture me getting dropkicked in the face because some fat girl thought she could crowdsurf but nobody could lift her and she got thrown in my direction.
Friday, August 27
Wednesday, August 11
Leave me alone
Yesterday while waiting for a bus some random woman made her way to the bench I was sitting on and exclaimed "Phew! Made it here in one piece!". I was the only one around so I couldn't just pretend to assume she's talking to someone else which is what I usually do when scary people try to talk to me so I had to fake a smile and a kind of nod type thing. Unfortunately I think this gave her the green light to start talking to me about the weather.
For the next 15 minutes she kept saying dumb things like "Damn this humidity" and "Oh, I just noticed the street lights aren't working. That must be why so many cars are speeding today" until I kind of pretended to be asleep. Then she figured she would try to catch my attention with "I wish it would snow just once in July. You know, something to give us a break from the sun. I had a friend once from Alaska, don't really remember their name, but they told me something once along the lines of 'Yeah it snows pretty much whenever it gets cold in Alaska' but then I thought to myself isn't it always cold in Alaska?" and laughed at it for like 5 minutes.
THANK GOD at this point it started raining relatively hard. Usually I would be angry if it started raining while I was waiting for a bus but this time it was like God himself was pissing on my shoulders. See, this forced the random hunk of meat that was currently talking to me to seek dryness inside the bus shelter. It wasn't raining too hard so I figured I could just sit in the rain and avoid talking to this scary lady while she was inside the shelter.
Of course even this master plan was thwarted when she commented, "Guess the rain doesn't bug you that much, eh?". Even with it raining and me quite clearly trying to ignore her she didn't give up. I replied "Well, as long as it's not raining too hard."
No more than 5 seconds later, it starts raining at least twice as hard. I realized I must look like an idiot to the guy that is crossing the street to come wait in the shelter. Oh well, at least I'm not being forced to talk to that buttertroll anymore. Once he showed up, she switched targets and I was alone for a bit. She tried talking to him but after about two minutes he left and took a bus across the street. Luckily she didn't try to make contact after that but it still sucked.
Then when we got on the bus she asks someone in the front "Can I sit there?" meaning the seat next to the lady she was asking. The lady gets up and walks to the middle of the bus without saying anything, and the crazy pyscho lady tries to say "Oh no you don't have to move I'll just sit right here!". I didn't say anything at that point but if there's one thing that lady DID have to do, it was move. There was no way in hell both of those people could fit in two seats side by side, with one of them taking up at LEAST one and a half seats. Don't kid yourself woman; you're fat. There's no way to pretend you aren't, so why don't you save yourself some trouble and admit it.
For the next 15 minutes she kept saying dumb things like "Damn this humidity" and "Oh, I just noticed the street lights aren't working. That must be why so many cars are speeding today" until I kind of pretended to be asleep. Then she figured she would try to catch my attention with "I wish it would snow just once in July. You know, something to give us a break from the sun. I had a friend once from Alaska, don't really remember their name, but they told me something once along the lines of 'Yeah it snows pretty much whenever it gets cold in Alaska' but then I thought to myself isn't it always cold in Alaska?" and laughed at it for like 5 minutes.
THANK GOD at this point it started raining relatively hard. Usually I would be angry if it started raining while I was waiting for a bus but this time it was like God himself was pissing on my shoulders. See, this forced the random hunk of meat that was currently talking to me to seek dryness inside the bus shelter. It wasn't raining too hard so I figured I could just sit in the rain and avoid talking to this scary lady while she was inside the shelter.
Of course even this master plan was thwarted when she commented, "Guess the rain doesn't bug you that much, eh?". Even with it raining and me quite clearly trying to ignore her she didn't give up. I replied "Well, as long as it's not raining too hard."
No more than 5 seconds later, it starts raining at least twice as hard. I realized I must look like an idiot to the guy that is crossing the street to come wait in the shelter. Oh well, at least I'm not being forced to talk to that buttertroll anymore. Once he showed up, she switched targets and I was alone for a bit. She tried talking to him but after about two minutes he left and took a bus across the street. Luckily she didn't try to make contact after that but it still sucked.
Then when we got on the bus she asks someone in the front "Can I sit there?" meaning the seat next to the lady she was asking. The lady gets up and walks to the middle of the bus without saying anything, and the crazy pyscho lady tries to say "Oh no you don't have to move I'll just sit right here!". I didn't say anything at that point but if there's one thing that lady DID have to do, it was move. There was no way in hell both of those people could fit in two seats side by side, with one of them taking up at LEAST one and a half seats. Don't kid yourself woman; you're fat. There's no way to pretend you aren't, so why don't you save yourself some trouble and admit it.
Thursday, August 5
Halle Berry is fucking annoying
Am I the only one that doesn't give a shit about Halle or her new movie Catwoman? Not like it's a shock to anyone but apparently the movie did pretty badly at the box office. Jesus christ did that movie look like a vortex of shit or WHAT. Of course that doesn't stop eTalk Daily from trying to hype it.
Just before it was released the local entertainment news show tried to make people see it by showing clips from an interview spread over a few days. I think they split the interview into parts so that the intended target audience, who wouldn't remember anything past two hours before the show itself, would fail to realize that all the interview consisted of was Halle and one of the absolute worst human beings I have ever seen on TV talking about that goddamn whip and her leather outfit. I think whoever wrote the questions for the interview must have drank a gallon of LSD then scribbled down any question which might be interpreted as something related to cats. Here's the gist of it:
Sorry to use caps but it's really necessary to show how fake the interview sounds. I think what E-Talk Daily did was just replace every word above with something similar in the thesarus, then play it on TV the next day and pass it off as a different interview. The only reason I sit through that shitheap of a show once in a while is to remind myself of why guns were invented.
That, and I really hate how everyone is like OMG HALLE BERRY IS SUCH A LEADER AND SHE'S A GOOD ROLE MODEL and shits their pants when there's nothing really special about her.
PS: whip
Just before it was released the local entertainment news show tried to make people see it by showing clips from an interview spread over a few days. I think they split the interview into parts so that the intended target audience, who wouldn't remember anything past two hours before the show itself, would fail to realize that all the interview consisted of was Halle and one of the absolute worst human beings I have ever seen on TV talking about that goddamn whip and her leather outfit. I think whoever wrote the questions for the interview must have drank a gallon of LSD then scribbled down any question which might be interpreted as something related to cats. Here's the gist of it:
Awful man: DID YOU GET HURT WHILE USING THE WHIP? I BET YOU TOOK A LOT OF CATNAPS ON SET EH! THAT BLACK LEATHER SURE WAS SKIMPY, YOU CERTAINLY ARE A ROLE MODEL FOR ACTRESSES ALL OVER!!
Halle: YEAH FILMING WAS REALLY THE CAT'S MEOW!
AM: IF YOU REALLY HAD NINE LIVES, WHAT WOULD YOU DO IN YOUR NEXT ONE?
H: EAT LOTS OF CATNIP HAHAHAH
AM: HEY WHEN YOU WERE USING THE WHIP DID YOU EVER FEEL SEXIER?
H: OH WELL I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN SAY ANYTHING LIKE THAT ON TELEVISION!
AM: WHAT'S THE MATTER? CAT GOT YOUR TONGUE?!
H: OH YOU CARD! THAT WAS TOTALLY UNEXPECTED!
Me: GIVE ME CANCER NOW
Sorry to use caps but it's really necessary to show how fake the interview sounds. I think what E-Talk Daily did was just replace every word above with something similar in the thesarus, then play it on TV the next day and pass it off as a different interview. The only reason I sit through that shitheap of a show once in a while is to remind myself of why guns were invented.
That, and I really hate how everyone is like OMG HALLE BERRY IS SUCH A LEADER AND SHE'S A GOOD ROLE MODEL and shits their pants when there's nothing really special about her.
PS: whip
Sunday, July 25
Insomnia for dummies
I woke up at 4pm yesterday, then played video games until midnight. My friend picked me up in his car, we drove to Tim Horton's and stayed till about 2am. Then we came here and watched The Mask on VHS. He passed out on his couch and here I am posting at 6:33am.
Summer + unemployment = freedom.
Thursday, July 22
Showtime
Alright it's time to go meet some friends and walk around the Just For Laughs festival like a bunch of tourist idiots. Bye.
Sunday, July 18
Status report
Uh, so without internet my house is apparently pretty boring. I've been coming over to my brother's house to use his computer most of the time. No luck with the job search but I have an assload of CV's to hand out tomorrow (if it doesn't rain). If I get lucky I'll get hired at EBGames.
Other than that I went to both the Jazz Festival and Just For Laughs in the past week. Jazz Fest was pretty much just tourists and drunken frenchmen poking you in the back for about an hour and a half trying to get a better view of whatever was going on. Then when you turn around to leave people push you forward out of their way and you get angry and leave.
Just For Laughs was pretty good though, a bunch of outdoor stuff going on like acrobats and kangaroo costumes and music. Triumph the comic insult dog is in town but it's 33$ to go see his show. If I was rich I'd be going, but maybe I'll get a glimpse of him outside making fun of French people.
It's raining a lot in Montreal which sucks a donkey's ass cuz it's really humid and hot in the morning then rainy and cold at night. Oh well.
Other than that I went to both the Jazz Festival and Just For Laughs in the past week. Jazz Fest was pretty much just tourists and drunken frenchmen poking you in the back for about an hour and a half trying to get a better view of whatever was going on. Then when you turn around to leave people push you forward out of their way and you get angry and leave.
Just For Laughs was pretty good though, a bunch of outdoor stuff going on like acrobats and kangaroo costumes and music. Triumph the comic insult dog is in town but it's 33$ to go see his show. If I was rich I'd be going, but maybe I'll get a glimpse of him outside making fun of French people.
It's raining a lot in Montreal which sucks a donkey's ass cuz it's really humid and hot in the morning then rainy and cold at night. Oh well.
Wednesday, July 7
Vote Ice Cream Dude for Prime Minister
So anyway the other day me, Myke, Nick and Nick (who shall be known as Farmer Nick and Nick with the Fro, respectively) went to the mall to waste some time. Some time in between trying to play free Xbox at Future Shop and staring at some kids play Dance Dance Revolution, we decide to pool our money together to get a 4 litre tub of ice cream and some spoons so we can eat it outside. 10 minutes and 7 dollars later, we're sitting outside Maxi on the patio chairs that they were displaying and scooping out ice cream with these cheap plastic spoons that are barely the size of a bottlecap.
We looked like dummies but it was worth it. A few people comment on us on the way into the Maxi with stuff like "That ice cream looks good" and stuff like that. Then, this random old guy who looked at least 60 years old walks up and says "Eh boys, having a picnic or what?" in a really strong generic old Italian man accent. Farmer Nick offers him some ice cream and he sits down at the table with us for a good ten minutes and eats ice cream with us. We talk about the weather and whatnot until we're ready to leave. I guess he went into the Maxi after that, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was just a hobo in a nice shirt trying to bum some ice cream off us. Either way he was the coolest random ice cream eating old man I've ever met and is worthy of the title Ice Cream Dude.
That's my story.
We looked like dummies but it was worth it. A few people comment on us on the way into the Maxi with stuff like "That ice cream looks good" and stuff like that. Then, this random old guy who looked at least 60 years old walks up and says "Eh boys, having a picnic or what?" in a really strong generic old Italian man accent. Farmer Nick offers him some ice cream and he sits down at the table with us for a good ten minutes and eats ice cream with us. We talk about the weather and whatnot until we're ready to leave. I guess he went into the Maxi after that, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was just a hobo in a nice shirt trying to bum some ice cream off us. Either way he was the coolest random ice cream eating old man I've ever met and is worthy of the title Ice Cream Dude.
That's my story.
Saturday, July 3
Friday, July 2
I wish
- Public transportation in this city was better. A lot better.
- I had a job.
- Stoney wasn't in Ottawa last night.
- There were fireworks every night.
- I had my high-speed internet again.
- My biological clock wasn't totally off.
- People weren't so afraid of teenagers. Last night we kept telling groups of people "Happy Canada Day" but only two of them answered. Jerks.
- I was watching the movie Snatch right now.
- Lists were easier to make.
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