Not too long ago, somebody successfully sued two teenage girls for leaving cookies on their porch as a surprise. Yes, somebody was sued for giving somebody cookies. I didn't believe it at first either. At the time I wished there was something I could do to show the woman how amazingly selfish and stupid she was acting.
Looks like I didn't have to do anything.
Friday, February 18
Friday, January 7
Wednesday, January 5
Generic title
Attention. The following things piss me off:
Stupidity. Not only stupidity in itself as everyone has stupid moments but the fact that stupidity is apparently a desired quality. People love to tell others how dumb they are rather than have an intelligent conversation. People have asked me, with straight faces, "Why do you waste your time watching documentaries?". Sorry, I guess I wasn't aware that choosing to learn on your own about whatever interests you was a waste of time. I also wasn't aware that what I choose to do on my time is any of your business. Anything that can be seen as educational is automatically hated by most younger people. I once sat quietly in class and read a book while my peers talked about how fucking wrecked they were on the weekend or how much they hate school solely for the point of hating it. People started making fun of me because I was reading. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. If you're going to waste your own time in school, then try to stop others from learning and wonder why you fail your tests, why don't you just stay in your goddamn house.
Bandwagon rebellion. All of a sudden it's cool to hate police officers for no reason. Cops have one of the worst fucking jobs in the world. They have to deal with strung-out homeless people, intoxicated criminals and god knows what all the time. This alone should make people respect police officers to a certain extent, but it doesn't. It's a growing trend among teens to hate cops. The police are not our fucking enemy. Stop pretending you're a gangster with a pure hatred for police and shut your fucking mouth. I asked somebody why they hated cops so much and they could only come up with "Because they don't let me smoke weed." Well boohoo, you're not the first person to get hassled by "the Man". Instead of whining like a baby and hating people for the sole reason that they are doing their JOB, why don't you write a letter to a politician urging them to change drug laws. Oh, that's right. Writing a letter might make you look smart and you definitely don't want to do that.
Hysteria. There's a big fuss in the states right now over a father who shined a laser pointer into an airplane's cockpit while pointing it into the sky with his daughter. He now faces up to 25 years in prison. Am I the only one that doesn't see a crime being commited? Temporarily blinding somebody is just being mildly annoying. It's not a crime to be annoying. If it was, most celebrities would be rotting in prison right now. The states think that shining a strong light into the cockpit of a MOVING AIRLINER could cause it to crash. Even if somebody could somehow keep the light focused into the eyes of the pilots while the plane moves at an ungodly speed through the air, such an evil and well-planned terrorist attack could be countered by... oh, I don't know. MOVING YOUR FACE A CENTIMETRE TO THE LEFT? Putting your hand up to block the light? It's really depressing to watch a nation of people allow their rights to be taken away from them in the name of safety. Duct tape is one of the best ways to tie people up quickly and effectively if you were hijacking a plane. Why hasn't duct tape been made illegal? I mean, if you are going to tell people they are not allowed to smoke God's plants in their own homes, why stop there? Why not ban cigarettes, which have been proven hundreds of times to be addictive in the worst sense of the word, give you cancer (not only you, but your children who don't even smoke, as well) and instantly cause rooms to smell like somebody died? Oh, that's right. It's because cigarettes make money. My mistake.
Tsunamis. Why couldn't they hit the United States more often? I'd like to see them invade the Pacific Ocean in retaliation.
Stupidity. Not only stupidity in itself as everyone has stupid moments but the fact that stupidity is apparently a desired quality. People love to tell others how dumb they are rather than have an intelligent conversation. People have asked me, with straight faces, "Why do you waste your time watching documentaries?". Sorry, I guess I wasn't aware that choosing to learn on your own about whatever interests you was a waste of time. I also wasn't aware that what I choose to do on my time is any of your business. Anything that can be seen as educational is automatically hated by most younger people. I once sat quietly in class and read a book while my peers talked about how fucking wrecked they were on the weekend or how much they hate school solely for the point of hating it. People started making fun of me because I was reading. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. If you're going to waste your own time in school, then try to stop others from learning and wonder why you fail your tests, why don't you just stay in your goddamn house.
Bandwagon rebellion. All of a sudden it's cool to hate police officers for no reason. Cops have one of the worst fucking jobs in the world. They have to deal with strung-out homeless people, intoxicated criminals and god knows what all the time. This alone should make people respect police officers to a certain extent, but it doesn't. It's a growing trend among teens to hate cops. The police are not our fucking enemy. Stop pretending you're a gangster with a pure hatred for police and shut your fucking mouth. I asked somebody why they hated cops so much and they could only come up with "Because they don't let me smoke weed." Well boohoo, you're not the first person to get hassled by "the Man". Instead of whining like a baby and hating people for the sole reason that they are doing their JOB, why don't you write a letter to a politician urging them to change drug laws. Oh, that's right. Writing a letter might make you look smart and you definitely don't want to do that.
Hysteria. There's a big fuss in the states right now over a father who shined a laser pointer into an airplane's cockpit while pointing it into the sky with his daughter. He now faces up to 25 years in prison. Am I the only one that doesn't see a crime being commited? Temporarily blinding somebody is just being mildly annoying. It's not a crime to be annoying. If it was, most celebrities would be rotting in prison right now. The states think that shining a strong light into the cockpit of a MOVING AIRLINER could cause it to crash. Even if somebody could somehow keep the light focused into the eyes of the pilots while the plane moves at an ungodly speed through the air, such an evil and well-planned terrorist attack could be countered by... oh, I don't know. MOVING YOUR FACE A CENTIMETRE TO THE LEFT? Putting your hand up to block the light? It's really depressing to watch a nation of people allow their rights to be taken away from them in the name of safety. Duct tape is one of the best ways to tie people up quickly and effectively if you were hijacking a plane. Why hasn't duct tape been made illegal? I mean, if you are going to tell people they are not allowed to smoke God's plants in their own homes, why stop there? Why not ban cigarettes, which have been proven hundreds of times to be addictive in the worst sense of the word, give you cancer (not only you, but your children who don't even smoke, as well) and instantly cause rooms to smell like somebody died? Oh, that's right. It's because cigarettes make money. My mistake.
Tsunamis. Why couldn't they hit the United States more often? I'd like to see them invade the Pacific Ocean in retaliation.
Monday, December 13
Artificial happiness
I'm pretty sure I may have discovered an alternative to Prozac. If this gets out the pharmaceutical companies might have me assassinated.
Just put a t-shirt in the dryer by itself for about 10 minutes, then as soon as the dryer cycle finishes open the door as fast as possible and put the t-shirt on. As long as the normal climate where you live isn't above ten million degrees celsius every day, a warm t-shirt will make you happy no matter what. It's even better in the winter. Spend the entire day in your boxers shivering and complaining about the heat, then when you are about to go to bed put on a freshly warmed shirt and jump into bed. If you're still either cold or cranky after that, well then go fuck yourself because you're hopeless.
Just put a t-shirt in the dryer by itself for about 10 minutes, then as soon as the dryer cycle finishes open the door as fast as possible and put the t-shirt on. As long as the normal climate where you live isn't above ten million degrees celsius every day, a warm t-shirt will make you happy no matter what. It's even better in the winter. Spend the entire day in your boxers shivering and complaining about the heat, then when you are about to go to bed put on a freshly warmed shirt and jump into bed. If you're still either cold or cranky after that, well then go fuck yourself because you're hopeless.
Friday, November 19
Quick Recap
- America fails to impress the world, again
- Bush sucks, still
- Cameramen who show the world what war is really like deserve to be shot by their own country, apparently
I wasn't aware that a cameraman doing his job was a threat to our country. When stuff like this happens, I don't know whether I should be thankful or sad. Of course it's sad to know soldiers are killing unarmed people across the world, but every time it happens I hope that people will start to wake up and realize that war isn't a game. For the people that think the marine is an evil man, a scumbag, a cold-hearted killer, ask yourselves what you would do if YOU were in his shoes. Assuming, of course, you weren't already dead or injured. When it's a choice between risking your life and immediately securing your safety, you don't have time to think about "morals". I don't support the war or the kiling of unarmed, wounded people but I'd probably be lying if I told you I wouldn't have done the same thing.
This is a WAR. Not a debate, not a tea party, not a after-school fistfight. In wars, people kill other people. It's a lot easier to say you're liberating a country when you don't know what's really going on, isn't it? All of a sudden the truth comes out and not only is the bearer of bad news condemned, but people are quick to blast the marine in question. Let me tell you the simple truth. PEOPLE ARE NOT ALWAYS "NICE" AND DO NOT ALWAYS FOLLOW THE "RULES". I'm pretty sure that's the general reason behind going to war in the first place. What makes anybody think that their country is an exception to human nature?
As much as I wish these things didn't happen, I learned that the sooner I accept the fact that they always have happened and always will, the sooner I can form a more realistic opinion. I just wish more people would stop seeing things in black and white.
On a less serious note, I quit my job because they put me on commission and that place in general sucked a lot of ass. If anybody ever calls you and asks you to grab your checkbook to verify your identity so that they can remove your banking account information from a computer system that other people have access to, just hang up on them.
Oh and I just found this valuable lesson on everybody's favorite drug propaganda website:
one day i was walking along and i saw sum people smoking sumthing, it smelt funny, and sum1 sed it was tea, and that it felt real cool 2 smoke, so i tried smoking tea at home, but got really sick, ive also tried sniffing vitafresh powder bcause sum1 said it got u high, but i got sick again, my parents werent happy,so ive stopped taking drugs. take notice of my warnings, stay away from drugs if u dont wana get sick i know from my drug experience
Don't smoke tea, you goddamn moron.
Monday, November 1
FINALLY
So yeah, my DSL modem just lit up and as soon as I get the username and password from Look, I'll be back up on interweb with all you fine people.
Oh and be sure to watch The Daily Show this week, what with all the electing going on right now it ought to be entertaining.
Oh and be sure to watch The Daily Show this week, what with all the electing going on right now it ought to be entertaining.
Sunday, October 24
:(
This weekend, my dog Carlo had to be put down because of a sudden stomach problem he developed only late last week. It came out of nowhere and by this Saturday he was unable to eat from it. We tried to treat him with antibiotics and special food but by Saturday it became clear that he would probably not recover.
I might have said I hated him but everybody knows that isn't true. I'll miss you, buddy.
I might have said I hated him but everybody knows that isn't true. I'll miss you, buddy.
Thursday, October 21
Telemarketers SUCK
So apparently I got a job yesterday, yeah I know I said I would never go back to telemarketing, but you know how things work out some times. The only difference is that now instead of selling old geezers credit cards I have to convince them their bank account is in danger and get their account information as verification. I probably should feel bad scamming people like that... but you know what, I don't.
Without giving away more details let me just tell you that the number of people who would read out their chequing account info over the phone to a complete stranger is actually pretty scary when you think about it. Suckers.
Without giving away more details let me just tell you that the number of people who would read out their chequing account info over the phone to a complete stranger is actually pretty scary when you think about it. Suckers.
Monday, September 27
LIGHTNING BOLT
You may have seen the famous video on the internet of the LARPers, or Live Action Role-Players. Basically they dress up like Everquest characters and act out huge battles, but in the video they pretend to use magic and spells also. A wizard (or mage or something, I don't know how they decide what to call themselves) throws little darts at another guy and screams LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! over and over. It's pretty geeky.
Well Montreal has something sort of like this, but with no magic spells. Every Sunday about 50-70 people get together on Mount Royal and fight each other with fake swords, staves, armor and hammers. Me and two friends went to the mountain yesterday and some guys asked us if we felt like trying it out. We did.
It was geeky, but also sort of fun.
Well Montreal has something sort of like this, but with no magic spells. Every Sunday about 50-70 people get together on Mount Royal and fight each other with fake swords, staves, armor and hammers. Me and two friends went to the mountain yesterday and some guys asked us if we felt like trying it out. We did.
It was geeky, but also sort of fun.
Friday, September 24
I'm Still Here
Yeah so I haven't had internet at home in a while now, so that's the main reason why I haven't written any blogs lately. It takes me like half an hour to write a good blog and every time I get started on one in school or at a friend's house I don't feel like it after about 3 minutes.
So what's going on over here? Not much has changed... I still really hate TV. Last night on CTV news they covered such compelling stories as a fire station in Winnipeg taking heat because the firemen were looking at porn on the station computer. So let me get this straight... they risk their lives every day for stupid shitheads who fall asleep with a burning cigarette or can't cook french fries properly and burn their house down but OH NO they looked at porn so they should be punished. I mean christ if everybody who watched porn got in trouble for it, humanity would have been enslaved by itself a long time ago. Oh yeah I forgot it's because firefighters are supposed to be good role models for kids and pornography is BAD. It will make you go blind and you may become addicted to it. Give me a fucking break.
And to finish it off, CTV's final story of the night was on whether or not Britney Spears faked her marriage, either for publicity to sell her new album or due to legal issues. I think the real question is: Why the fuck does anybody care? Why haven't the people that do care been deported to the Sun yet? CTV seemed to express the opinion that if the marriage was fake, it was for publicity reasons and that she was just trying to stay in the spotlight until her new album comes out. Maybe they should realize that by covering the story in the first place, she's already succeeded in drawing attention away from the important things in life and towards her.
Now I might have expected to see this kind of crap on eTalk Daily (don't get me started on that piece of shit excuse for a show. Everybody who thinks anything reported on that show is even mildly important should be shot out of a cannon into a black hole.) or Entertainment Tonight, but not fucking CTV NEWS.
Then again maybe I don't really hate TV. I mean I love Family Guy and The Simpsons and The Daily Show but hate almost everything else on TV, but I don't hate TV itself. I guess I should say I hate what's on TV at almost any given time.
So what's going on over here? Not much has changed... I still really hate TV. Last night on CTV news they covered such compelling stories as a fire station in Winnipeg taking heat because the firemen were looking at porn on the station computer. So let me get this straight... they risk their lives every day for stupid shitheads who fall asleep with a burning cigarette or can't cook french fries properly and burn their house down but OH NO they looked at porn so they should be punished. I mean christ if everybody who watched porn got in trouble for it, humanity would have been enslaved by itself a long time ago. Oh yeah I forgot it's because firefighters are supposed to be good role models for kids and pornography is BAD. It will make you go blind and you may become addicted to it. Give me a fucking break.
And to finish it off, CTV's final story of the night was on whether or not Britney Spears faked her marriage, either for publicity to sell her new album or due to legal issues. I think the real question is: Why the fuck does anybody care? Why haven't the people that do care been deported to the Sun yet? CTV seemed to express the opinion that if the marriage was fake, it was for publicity reasons and that she was just trying to stay in the spotlight until her new album comes out. Maybe they should realize that by covering the story in the first place, she's already succeeded in drawing attention away from the important things in life and towards her.
Now I might have expected to see this kind of crap on eTalk Daily (don't get me started on that piece of shit excuse for a show. Everybody who thinks anything reported on that show is even mildly important should be shot out of a cannon into a black hole.) or Entertainment Tonight, but not fucking CTV NEWS.
Then again maybe I don't really hate TV. I mean I love Family Guy and The Simpsons and The Daily Show but hate almost everything else on TV, but I don't hate TV itself. I guess I should say I hate what's on TV at almost any given time.
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